HOW LOUSY I AM.

yup. this was my topic for my public speech yesterday at Speechcraft. I was selected to go on stage and do a speech on this topic which was chosen by myself. and when i presented to my group, my groupmates laughed at me. but to me, i felt ok. coz i really wanted everybody to know how lousy i am. i really can't go up and say how good i am when i felt otherwise. in the end, i was nominated to represent my group. i stumbled. i froze. i was dumbstrucked. they encouraged me by applausing.

sigh. got back my results. sucks. really sucks. sucks until i really comtemplating to quit school. tried cutting myself again. failed. it seeems like my path has reached a dead end. i don know how to carry on. where should i go?

again, i thought of how lousy i am. come to think abt it, i have really nth good about myself. i can't think of any. sigh. wad a failure i am. a loser.

talked to mum about my thoughts, how lousy i am. surprisely, jus when i thought that i'm so darn lousy, she told me that i've never make her worry abt me. i know how to think, i know wad's right and wad's wrong. From a parents' point of view, it beats anything. I smiled.

alot of stuffs have been going through in my mind. wad's life, y is God treating me this way etc. but despite all these, i know that everything happens for a reason, and today is a result of yesterday.

Dad overheard our conversation. he told me to relax. as long as i've given my best, there's nth to regret abt. he also said that i can always take over his business. i immediately rebated; i don wan to rely on my parents. i wan to success using my own abilities. i don wan to be like morning glory, i wan to be like catus. i wan my parents to be proud of wad i'm doing.

throughout all these years, Dad and Mum have never been concern about my studies. i mean, they don give stress to me on my studies, coz they know that i know wad i want. i'm not smart, they know it. they know that i have expectations for myself. and my expectations are set for them.

Kind souls have been helping me. i'm really grateful to them.

Thank You who people who have helped me in one way or another.

Thank You Very Much.

♥ how will my journey be like?

Jenny
19.20.
NUS.CSC.
my travel blog


`wishlist*
freedom.think i have enough alr.
21.idonwanagrowupanymore
dad's good health.
おまもり.
camera.
日本.
Tomato Can's bag.
nus.
7D6N to hk with sc.
japanese.
mp3 player, again.
fossil "princess" watch?no more le. but i've got a replacement le.=)
running shoes.
new pair of spectacles.
japanese dictionary.
NOC. i'm back!whee.
ballet.


`hall of places*
waterfront
ikea
E2 IT cluster

`resolns/2006*
>enter unii'm officially admitted.
>enter navy idon'twannagoNavyanymore
>save $3000 by the end of yrcan hor!jus that i went to withdraw=x
>pass my jap exami passed~ yeay!
>i-can't-say-this this one i don think so.=(

`2007
>don't look back.look forward
>pass jap exam,again
>pull up my CAP

`2008
>pass jap exam, again
>pull up my CAP
>spend more time with family
>知足
>exercise once a week

`2009
it's over already. amazing how time flies

`2010
to be updated soon

xiaofen
eileen
jialiang
eliz
biaojie
ying2
puiyee the cheat
`ma'at*
glenn
tan ching
nono
lingfong
gilbert
zin
`csc*
michelle
koyak
`ninjaturtle*
zoo
siahjen
`taka b2 2007*
melissa
meiling
en ren
ashley
claris

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